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Showing posts from July, 2005

The Dog Days' Of Summer

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She talks. She uses the bathroom. She drinks tea. She likes coffee. She talks back. She has run the mules ragged, and they are on Strike. They refuse to be anywhere near her. She pouts. I plead. Steve chases her with a wild look in his eyes. We have tried water: hoses,spray bottles,taps,glasses, and even sprayers. NO DICE! We have tried yelling. loud,low,long,often,quiet,sincerely,insanely,shreikingly. NO DICE! We have pleaded,cajoled,questioned,argued,demonstrated,hollered, and ignored. NO DICE! For any one out there who ever said I should have kids...may a pox rain on your head! Quite Frankly, A Puppy is plenty!! Lucy is insane. She chases the cat, holds court with the Mules, stalks birds, eats everything she can( rocks, wood, rugs, grass, leaves, fur, cats, mice, hoot owls) and is not afraid of any thing on this earth, with the exception of two words.... " BAD LUCY!" But then she forgets whatever is was she did wrong, and here we go again...... Lucy(short for Lucifer!

The Sex Locker!

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Packed up the Wagon, lubed the wheels, and tore outta here for three days. Ended up going thru some remarkable country( the Big Horns) and some butt numbing country( rest of Wyoming to Colorado!) My Hubby and I went to pick up a Sex Locker(uh, Camper. Camper!) that we bought( on ebay...sorta) and it had the misfortune of being in Kansas! Crap! So off we went over the hill, tore thru grannys house, plauged the rest of Wyoming, and hit Denver traffic, smog, and crazies at about noon the first day. I spewed soda on the dash, rutted out in a few places, and flattened my butt more than I have in a long time on that buck board! I pulled out the splinters, shored up my ass, and pushed on toward Johnson City Kansas. I rode thru hills that looked like boobs, and wheat and corn fields that resembled, well, by this time, Queenie's Butt! All for a 17 foot gooseneck ( sex locker) so I could go camping without being the main course for misqutios! Well, ended up being worth it. I will neve